My sister called me yesterday last week to ask if I was going to my class reunion. When she asked why not, I asked her which of a hundred reasons did she want to hear?

1. Other classes were invited to attend
2. That means my sister was going to be there
3. I can listen to music from 1982 whenever I want on XM.
4. I don’t remember much about high school at all.
5. What could I possibly have to talk about with people I haven’t seen in 25 years?
6. I’m really no good at making small talk.
7. And I don’t even consider myself much of a people person.
8. I can never, I mean never ever, remember anybody’s name.
9. It would be way to hard for me to pass up all of the crappetizers.
10. I’m afraid I’d say something about my secret blogging life.
11. I’m just not into showing off and bragging about stuff.
12. And I sure as hell don’t need to hear about other people’s fabulous lives.
13. If we were meant to live life in the rear view mirror, they wouldn’t call it “reverse”.

OK, so I guess it only feels like a hundred reasons. Only thirteen? I guess I’ll have to save this post for TT, then… so there you go!

I used to have a puppy.

You know my puppy, don’t you? I must have written about the journey last winter to the breeder’s home down south and all that. He was so small! I’ve got pictures of him lying on this geometric-pattern rug in the living room, and in the pictures he’s only taking up one little square. But now when he stretches out, he must take up three, even four of them!

So small, so sweet, so innocent. But that was last winter and now it’s… has it really been that long? He’s almost eleven months old!

Yes, I used to have a puppy. Now he is a dog.

Almost, anyway — and not just the calendar. He’s more mature, he’s so well behaved… well, to a point.

But it is time to get him fixed. And yes, all pets should be spayed or neutered. Let’s just get that right out of the way. But he’s a working dog, so he needs his hormones for growth and development and all that.

BUT… and this is where we run into trouble… But what if we want to breed him? And so far he is showing so much promise in herding and agility. And his temperament — he is such a sweetie! What if we decide we want to get a female, or what if someone with a female wants a little of our pup?

What, indeed. That’s where the puppy in-vitro clinic comes in. I kid you not. You can save your dog in the canine sperm bank and then later on make a withdrawal for breeding. You have to pay for this, of course, but I think it’s a worthwhile investment — just in case we end up with a champion in our kennel.

But there’s the small matter of… well, the deposit to the bank. We made plans to meet with a veterinarian that does this kind of thing. I made it clear to Wifey that she would take Puppy in for his appointment. Well we show up for our appointment. We were running kind of late because we got a little lost finding the guy. So there I am with Puppy on his leash. And before I know it, the vet is giving me instructions. “Bring him right over here… stand here…”

And then all of a sudden he is… and he is… and OMG, is he… and…

Aren’t you glad I believe in long story short?

Let’s just say I used to have a puppy. Now he is a dog man.

Vice President Cheney is in hospital.

Former Vice President Gore has been meeting privately with President Bush in the Oval Office.

You know what? I think Gore’s going to be offered his old job back!

::fingers crossed::

Seriously, Mister Vice President — I hope you’re feeling better soon!

Has it really been two years? Wow, the time has flown right by.

Two years… wow. I think I should make some changes around here.

Any suggestions?

Wifey gave me the greatest gift for my birthday.

I’ve only visited The Onion a few times, and it was usually something stupid, if you want my honest opinion, and you know how I feel about people sending me e-mails with links to stuff like that? What, you don’t? LOL, where did I put that rant? :)

Anyway, they wrote a book and it is the funniest thing I’ve read in a long time.

It’s like an atlas, the kind where they show page-by-page about the states and countries, and they’ve got something amusing, sarcastic, downright awful at times, to say about pretty much everything! But keep a box of kleenex handy, because you’ll laugh so hard your eyes will try and pop out!!

Now I have to warn you, it’s not for everybody. If you’re easily offended, or if you’re sensitive to certain language usages, shall we say, this book may not be for you. Click the link and you can use the “look inside” or whatever they call it to give it a little preview yourself.

But if you know someone with a sense of humor that isn’t afraid of a few f-words and scathing satire — it makes a really excellent gift, and as a recipient, I should know! :)

To you and yours, a Happy Thanksgiving! There was a great op-ed in this past Sunday’s Boston Globe, and I’d link to it, if I had a pointer to it, and maybe I’ll look for it.

I arrived for fitness class on Monday, was sitting on the floor of the aerobics room stretching when super-cute fitness instructor Lori came in. “I guess it’s just you and me,” she told me.

And I knew what that meant. The official rule is there have to be two to have a class. I guess that other time was just a dream come true.

I was the only one to show up for class on Tuesday, and again on Wednesday. She knows how hard I’m working. But does she know how much she has helped me? “In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I want you to know that I’m thankful for you,” I told her. She thanked me and we talked for a little while. “One more,” I said, “and we can have class.”

“I need it, too,” she said, “so I can work on my big butt.”

“You’ll have to find one first,” I said. What I was thinking, though, was that she has the cutest butt in the whole entire world, which is actually true. I just left it alone.

I told her how my plan for Thanksgiving is to have no dessert. I’m going to take just a little bit of turkey and all that, so I can have more if I want, but none of the pie and stuff.

And no birthday cake. I didn’t tell her it’s my birthday.

She’s got me bouncing around on one of those big fitness balls, so I’d better get down to the basement and do that. It’ll be the only workout I get today. Tomorrow I’ll probably go into the office just for a workout, and so I can weigh myself afterwards, as I periodically do, and see what, if any, damage, the holiday has caused.

We’re going to Wifey’s parents’ house and I told her flat out — no birthday cake. “Well what if my mother gets one, you’re going to be polite about it.” To which I suggested that she could make sure her mother doesn’t get one. This should be interesting.

Gobble gobble, y’all!

It happened on my way to work. I started counting. One. Two. Three.

I got to a dozen somewhere in Nashua at 8:39 A.M.

S-word, F-word. Snow Flakes.

And then I stopped counting, because they were coming two at a time. And then oddly enough, the further south I went on the Everett Turnpike, the more flakes I was seeing.

S-word, F-word. Snow Flurries. For real. Winter ‘07-’08 has started.

S-word. F-word. Oh Shit. Fucking Winter. I am just not ready for this!! :/

If your boss, who sits in the next office, has a really annoying ring tone and the volume is turned all the way up on his phone…

Does that make it OK to come in on the weekend and — hoping he hasn’t locked up his phone — change his ring tone to something more normal?

Because that’s the only thing I’ve got planned for tomorrow.

My son is selling candy. It’s for school — a fundraiser — a really good cause.

So that means that I am selling candy. It’s for my son — a really good cause.

We’ve got these kitchens here in the office where people get coffee and keep their lunches in the refrigerator and stuff like that. And… BUY CANDY! So earlier today I was walking down the hall near the local kitchen and there was this guy with a candy bar walking back to his office.

And let’s just say — and I hate being judgmental like this, because I’ve been there, I’ve SO been there. Let’s just say he looked more like my before picture than my now picture, OK? And I thought, gee, this guy really doesn’t need to be buying candy bars.

But OH WELL… it is a really good cause. :/

I never thought I’d be drawing a comparison between Hillary Clinton and Richard Nixon, but this whole questiongate thing is so strange.

As someone who thinks one of Sen. Clinton’s opponents — and not one of the so-called “frontrunners” — would make a far better president than she would, it’s hard to admit that at times, it has appeared that she has had this nomination locked up. This notion is absurd, of course, when you really look at all of the candidates and who has what experience and… well…

But this post is about her. And Dick. I’m too young to remember this firsthand, but from what I know, President Nixon was expected to win his reelection in a landslide without the shenanigans that made “-gate” a household suffix. And then we all know what happened after that.

OK, maybe the comparison isn’t everything I’ve made it out to be. Hillary Clinton’s campaign has been declining for a while now. It’s a little early for desperation to set in, but politics is a very strange game — and it’s never played mistake-free.

As for the “lock” on the nomination — this was being talked about at least a year and a half before anybody else had their hat ready to throw into the ring. It’s very exciting to think that America is ready for a woman to be president. But now the voters are really weighing their options and thinking about what’s really important.

We have a long way to go before any of this is decided. There is plenty of time before anybody needs to start worrying. Even me. :)

Sigh… I need a vacation!

I don’t care where — I just need to get away!

Which one would you pick?

What’s your dream vacation?