I’m so far behind — I think they’re probably up to #8 by now. OK, #7. Over at the Blog Fodder Hub, I mean.

Anyway, #5 asks us to tell a story about our in-laws. Well that’s easy. I’ve got the greatest in-laws you could have. But boy do they get on my nerves sometimes. So part rant, part fodder, here goes.

It’s my mother-in-law, really. Sweetest, nicest lady you could ever meet. But when it comes to dessert, I am just not a big dessert eater. I don’t need dessert. I don’t want dessert. And it also happens that I don’t eat chocolate and I don’t eat ice cream. So when it’s time for dessert, these facts make it easier not to have any dessert because it’s usually one or the other, right?

But no. My mother-in-law, because she is so sweet and nice, will make something other than the stuff I don’t eat, so that I can have some. But I don’t want some!! If we’re at her house, I’ll usually take something, just to be nice. But if they’ve brought something to my house, I do what I want, which is usually not to have any.

Then there was Christmas. By Christmas night I’d had more than enough cookies and candy and whatever other crap to eat. We were at Wifey’s aunt and uncle’s house and so were were her parents. There was plenty to eat, all dessert kind of stuff, and it was in the just-help-yourself mode, which is plenty fine with me. I sat on the couch and was talking with one of Wifey’s cousins and whoever else was there.

My mother-in-law, because she is so sweet and nice, was asking if anyone wanted anything. She brought a piece of pie for my youngest and that was nice of her. She asked me if I wanted anything, there was a cheesecake with no chocolate. I said no, thank you. “Oh, don’t you like cheesecake?” was her reply.

I was more than a little annoyed by this. Maybe I don’t make the best choices when it comes to what to eat. But when it comes to what not to eat, I think I’m pretty much right on.

What I got from this exchange was that if you don’t like something you don’t eat it, but otherwise *damn it* you’re going to have some. Last time I checked, I was a grown-up, capable of making my own decisions.

Boss your own kid around. But please, me you can leave alone, thank you very much.