I had the weirdest dream the other night. I was driving around in my car, smoking a cigarette… Hey, wait a minute, I thought. Do I smoke? Well of course I do, I thought next. And I continued on smoking away in my dream.

But no, I don’t smoke, never have. And how weird is it that I would have this interruption of consciousness, or so I thought, in the middle of this dream! Weird shit, this is!

And this morning… I’ll call it morning even though it was 3 A.M. when the dream woke me up… and it was one of those thank god this wasn’t real kind of dreams. Wifey had decided to leave me, and there was some reason, but even as I was waking up I couldn’t remember what the reason was. It was just some disagreement and “this isn’t working” and that was that.

It was devastating and as often happens with dreams, I find, I still had those feelings once I’d woken up.

And there was also this weird sex thing in the dream that I don’t even understand. It was as if holographic images were being projected onto Wifey’s body and I was supposed to follow their instructions somehow. Like I said, weird shit.

Oh and that’s not even the weirdest of it! There was some kind of plot going on and we were part of this evil revolutionary conspiracy! That would never happen, I would only be involved in a revolutionary plot if it were totally non-evil!

Yeah, it was some weird bunch of dreams. I’m just really glad I’m awake now. OR AM I??? ::cue eerie music::